Emotional Abuse Case 1

This case is about a 35 year old male from Canada who suffered emotional abuse from a narcissistic mother. This abuse left him emotionally distraught and not able to function in society as he was having a daily battle in his head with imagined arguments with his mother. Because those arguments were in his head, there was no closure, and the cycle would repeat again and again.

This person contacted me out of desperation as he had been down every other path seeking help. He had been to psychiatrists who only prescribed him medication to deal with the effect. He had also sought the help of psychologists who only worked on coping skills. Those approaches deal with the effect, however my approach is to deal with the cause. When the cause is addressed and eliminated, the effect will end.

His primary symptoms was he expected to fail, and because he expected it he was self sabotaging on a subconscious level causing the failure to happen. He also was not able to focus on anything except the simplest of tasks as the voices simply would not let in concentrate.

Needless to say this case was very complex and thus several facets needed to be addressed. The primary thing that needed to be addressed was to silence the voices. They were present in almost every waking moment and in his dreams. Silencing the voices was done by doing tangible tasks and deep hypnosis into somnambulism. The tangible tasks provided a sense of closure, and the hypnotic suggestions were focusing on that he was right about a lot of things, and that his mother was suffering from a personality disorder that causes her to be abusive to other people.

Once these initial concepts were grasped on a subconscious level, headway was starting to be made and the voices eventually went silent. His position was backed by known facts and they could be documented, while his mother’s abuse was rooted in lies meant to degrade him. However as this all started at a young age of about 3, self doubt was deeply rooted in every aspect of his thinking. So in this case, researching those facts provided him with the knowledge he was right all along and he could bring initial closure.

From the time he initially started with clinical hypnotherapy until the time the voices fell silent was almost 5 months of therapy. Considering that clinical hypnotherapy works 4 times faster than any cognitive approach, cognitive therapy would have been much longer. This means it would have taken about 20 months if he had done it any other way. All through the therapy he kept saying that he was getting much more results with me than he had with anyone else, and that was in reference to 25+ years of seeing counselors, psychologists, and psychiatrists.

At this point he was empowered with facts supporting his side, and he could face his extended family and get them all on the same page and cut past his mother’s lies with documented facts. With his mother being narcissistic she also spread lies to his family to support her lies, and this is classic behavior of someone who is narcissistic.

Much of the contact with his family was done by Skype as most of his family was either in Canada or the UK. Once that was done and he had positive feedback from his family after they verified all he said was true, he actually broke down in tears and cried for several hours because he knew the arguments in his head with his mother had finally come to an end. His family also felt angry at his mother for deceiving them all these years and making him a family outcast for no reason at all other than to feed his mother’s narcissistic supply.

At this point all that remained was confronting his mother to bring final closure. He knew he had to do this face to face. If not she would just end the Skype call and block him. During the discovery of what his mother had done to him, it was very easy to see she had not only emotionally and physically abused him, but also broke a few of Canada’s child protection laws in the process and she could possibly face several years in jail. That gave him confidence and courage to face her as he now knew the law was on his side as well.

Confident he could now deal with his narcissistic mother, he traveled to Canada to bring final closure. Once that was done he could be free of her abuse and have a normal life.